This is Chester. When I was in Afghanistan I got a care package from one of those “Adopt a Soldier” programs that lets families send care packages to service men and women who are deployed overseas. Anyway, I got this care package, and it came with the usual stuff: Baby wipes, crackers, peanut butter, the Dad threw in a pack of cigarettes, and there was some jerky. But there was also a little beanie baby gold fish and a hand written note from a 7 year old girl that said
“Dear Soldier, (I wasn’t even mad)
I hope you are doing well. I’m sorry you have to miss thanksgiving with your family. This is my friend Chester. He keeps me safe from monsters, but I think you need him more than I do. I hope he keeps you safe from the monsters you’re fighting. Take good care of him for me”.
You bet your ass that little fish was in my pocket every time I went on patrol.
Being friends with me consists of me sending you bad jokes at 2:47 in the morning
listen up you motherfucker
i thought i had a crush!! but it turned out to just be a 2 day long infatuation where i was actually just bored
you kids these days with your rapidly growing concern for the state of the world and your knowledge of important issues at increasingly younger ages despite having been told your opinions don’t matter by the adults who put you in these situations
follow the yolo brick road
*loses 5 lbs* I don’t see a difference
*gaines 0.003 lbs* Why did I let myself go
CAN WE JUST TALK ABOUT THE FACT THAT POPE FRANCIS IS SO FRIKKIN CHILL THAT IF AN ALIEN WALKED IN TO THE VATICAN HE WOULDN’T EVEN FREAK OUT HE’D JUST BE LIKE “SUP DUDE LETS GO GET YA SOME JESUS”
he’s such a determined lil pup ready to face the world aw
LET’S TRASH THIS PLACE